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It’s not possible to fully express what the last few weeks have been like for me (Beth) in a simple blog post.  I know my words will fall short in describing what has been a major life event for me.  Much has happened.  I will give an update, as I know some have asked for more detail.

The week of Greg’s 31st birthday (week of July 17th), my Dad called and strongly encouraged us to head for Louisville ASAP.  My Grandma (Kate and Ella’s “Gigi”)  was diagnosed with cancer only 6 weeks before (though completely healthy and vibrant at the age of 85 up until that sudden diagnosis), but she was suddenly very sick, and Dad knew we needed to hurry.  We packed our bags and drove 12 hours to Louisville, getting there in time to be with Grandma on the last evening she was alert enough to talk to all of us.  It was a very emotional time for our whole family.  She was thrilled to see our girls one last time.  We were able to say our goodbyes, shed our tears, and be with family during such an emotional time.  Greg had to fly back to DC for a few days during all of it, but I was able to stay with the girls with my parents during my Grandma’s last few days of life in my parents’ house.  I will never forget those days.  Hospice was coming and going, and it was quite an experience to not only watch my Grandma slip away, but to watch my Dad, a physician of 35 years, be a son, a Doctor, and the primary caregiver to his Mom all at the same time.  It was a privilege to get to be there, to hold Grandma’s hand, to rehearse many of our favorite memories with her.

The last night of my Grandma’s life, I stayed with her by myself for a few hours.  I sat by her bedside, held her hand, and talked to her, though I knew she couldn’t hear me.  I could hear the CHBC hymns cd, echoing in the background, hymns singing of the hope of the gospel, over and over again…”My sin, not in part, but the whole - is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, praise the Lord, oh my soul!”  In the midst of such sadness, I was so deeply grateful that my family had the hope of Christ to cling to in our grief.  I was so very thankful that my Grandma knew she was a sinner in need of a Savior and had trusted in Christ.  I was so grateful that my Grandma did not fear death, but she was ready to be with Christ.  That night I sang hymns to her.  In the quietness of my parents’ family room, I sang “It is Well With My Soul”, “Man of Sorrows”, and “Amazing Grace.”  I will never forget that evening and the joy of singing the gospel to her.  Later that evening, my parents and I were at her bedside when she took her last breath.

The week that followed was one of great hope and comfort in Christ, and yet deep sadness at the same time.  At the visitation, there was a constant line of people out the door at the funeral home (for six hours!) waiting to speak to my parents (and us) and to share their love for my Grandmother.  It was overwhelming to see the love poured out for our family and the number of people whose lives she touched.

And the funeral…I know I am biased, but my brother, Brian, preached, and it was outstanding.  He had such a unique combination of remembering the joys of loving Grandma and being loved by her, and yet he focused on how she held fast to Christ firm until the end (Heb. 3:14).  My Dad also gave a talk about Grandma’s life - it was beyond great.  He had me type it out for him the day before, and so my tears were flowing even before he gave it at the funeral.  He spoke of how she was “just as sweet, kind, and loving in her suffering and dying as she was in living” - and I saw myself how true that was.  (I was reminded just this week that the Puritans said it was their goal in life to die well, and I can’t help but to think of what I saw in my Grandmother in her last days.)  What a joy it was to remember the way my Grandmother lived her life in such a selfless, sacrificial way to serve those she loved and those in need.  Joyful service.  Contentment.  Taking great pleasure in serving her family.  But in the end, she was clinging to Christ to save her, knowing that he was her only hope in this life.  Oh, and remember the 3 hymns I mentioned above that I sang to her the night she died?  Those are the 3 hymns Dad and Brian picked for us to sing at her funeral - without me ever mentioning it.

As the only Grand-daughter, I now have the privilege of wearing Grandma’s wedding ring.  It is beyond gorgeous!  Yet, it is so meaningful to me, not because of the beauty of the diamonds, but because I watched this loving, selfless, and faithful woman wear this ring for as long as I can remember.  As a little girl, we would sit at her kitchen table, eat whatever scrumptious baked goods she had made for our sleepover and she would tell me the stories of Grandpa…of how they started dating (often Grandpa would chime in with his version), their early years of marriage, etc.  When I was a teen and a young adult, we’d sit at her table and talk, and I think the only time she ever took the ring off was for me to try it on for fun.  She’d talk about how fun it would be to see me married with my own children one day, of how much I’d love it…and she was right.  I could go on and on with memories of her - I don’t think I’ll ever water my flowers without thinking of her - she was determined to teach me the beauty and fun of watching flowers grow!

I’ll save more for another day when my girls nap a long time again. :)  If you’ve read this far, surely you deserve to see some pictures of the girls and their 2 weeks in Louisville with family!  Lots of pics to come…

This entry was posted on Thursday, August 6th, 2009 at 2:17 pm and is filed under Our Life, Travel log, Family, Prayer. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can skip to the end and leave a response. Pinging is currently not allowed.